Whisky

I am enraged by those age check things when you look at Scotch whisky distillery websites (example). Will looking at pictures of seaweed and highland cows and distilleries and peaty hillsides make 12 years olds more likely to hit the booze? Will they be saving their pennies to try the latest port cask expression? Will they say, "well, I didn't enjoy Frosty Jack's very much, but that 21 year old Old Pulteney with its tastes of engine oil and smoke looks just the thing for me"? Is there scientific evidence that febrile young minds exposed to boozy images will be turned from the path of light, corrupted, set on the path to a diseased relationship with alcohol, bibulous futures sealed as certainly as if they had crossed the event horizon of a black hole?

And if they're old enough to look at a distillery website, aren't they also old enough to choose a fake date of birth?

What good can this possibly do? Bah.

I was looking for work reasons, by the way. More of that soon.